Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I'm blowing this popsicle stand


I've been thinking about it, and I've decided to leave. Tonight, under the cover of darkness, I will claw through the screen of the tiny bathroom window which the humans consistently leave open at night, and make my escape. I've got several things I wish to see in life, namely Victoria Falls, Constantinople and Mandalay Bay, and I don't wish to lie here on this comfy carpet eating fish-shaped kibbles a minute longer.

Although I have considerable assets in offshore accounts, simply purchasing a plane ticket and traveling present obvious communication issues ("Awwww, little kitty-booboo, how'd you get out of your cagey-cage and into this first class seat?"). Needless to say, I'll be traveling steerage most of the way, likely by ship. It will be an old-world adventure of Hemingway-ish proportions. For all believers in the feline betterment movement, thanks for your support. I'll make my next entry from a Zimbabwean web cafe. If I don't make it, I'll see you on the other side. Spay and neuter your humans.

No comments:

Post a Comment